Jeff

engineering woes

So I am finishing up this report. I am realizing how much I still have to do this semester and really not looking forward to all of it. Some of it is probably due to the three exams next week that I really don’t feel like taking. I also am a large step behind in my Object-Oriented Programming course. But I have a feeling I can fly through that when I get around to crunching it all out. Hopefully tomorrow will give me plenty of time to burn on that course. I also should get around to starting to jump ahead on the next step of the processor design. It would be nice not having to crunch it all out in the last week. I will probably post the code or the compiled result of the programming assignments for anyone who wants to play with them. I really just want to get it all finished up soon. Try and enjoy some of my senior year =.

I find myself bored a lot these days. I don’t have much that keeps me entertained and I just end up resorting to homework. Some of it is due to the fact that I have eliminated many of the distractions that would usually get in the way, such as playing computer games which I have ultimately ignored the majority of my time this semester, which is nice. I have become engross with Kongregate, a social browser game site. But I am running out of games to play and beat. I have reached a level 10 in like two weeks, which is a sad symbol of my loserness =.

Oh well, I should get back to compiling the results of the processors now, this makes me want to lay down and wake up in a week.

Pipelined Processor

So I just got back from lab. My pipelined processor source works for all the files they gave us. A pipelined processor is processor optimized to run at higher clock speeds (the GHz or MHz values given for the processor). It is pretty rewarding to know that I can make a processor, the thing that runs a computer. Its also a headache to look and figure out the code. But I don’t think I will meet many people in my life who can say that they have made a working processor. We have to do a report next week after break is over and then make the caches and then turn it into a multi core processor. I need to do the hardware testing tomorrow, seeing if the source code on the computer can turn into a real version I can hold in my hands…

Fall break is this weekend. I get to spend the Saturday and Sunday at a frisbee tournament and then the Monday and Tuesday just chilling in Indy. It’s a good break coming in good time. I have to spend time catching up on my coding for my Object Oriented course. I’m mostly done with the general code for the Breakout game in between the Java and C++, I just need to transplant the rest of the code between the two languages. That will come after this 437 is done. Its a nice senior year I have to say. Nothing is daunting, after the past three years it seems like all of us have already been there and done that, so this workload isn’t even shocking or stressful. Now I am going to sleep a bit before class tomorrow…

no doubt

Why does she always have this doubt about me ?

Have I not been clear enough in my feelings and thoughts ?

I just hate hearing it, hearing that she doubts me. The fact that she seems to believe that she will end up alone and that I will suddenly get this urge to go looking for something better when she’s the only one I’ve wanted to be with for so long. She just seems afraid to give in, to commit like I have. It pains me, I am so scared right now. Scared that I may have ended it, if only by accident. I want to be with her, I have not a single inkling of doubt about that fact, but if she is always going to give herself an avenue out, a way for me to hurt her to make it easier for her to get out, I don’t know how this can continue. I am too afraid of hurting her, I don’t want to be like those other guys, the ones who think their feelings are above those they love. I would rather suffer than see my actions put someone I love in pain. I just don’t want to see it over, not when I feel there is still so much more to go. But if I will end up hurting you, which these doubts I feel will bring about this pain, then I don’t want to give myself the chance to let it come to fruitation.

If you are reading this, know that I am always here, there is nothing holding me back. I have not once been untrue to you. I just hope and pray that it will be all better, I don’t know what will happen with the rest of this semester otherwise…